I don't write. I'm too self-conscious for it. My brain works in pictures first, sounds second. But writing? No sire.
I'm bad at expressing myself verbally. Can't keep track of my train of thought long enough for me to form coherent paragraphs. Me and my emotions have never been on speaking terms either. And small-talk is but a herculean task for me. So I often don't say what I'm thinking.
I've tried to dive into prose. But it hasn't helped much. Mental images are very hard to put on paper without making the readers quit in annoyance after two paragraphs describing every single, subtle movement of the main character as they mused over the past two days while making themselves a coffee.
"Then don't do that", but then what's the point? It'd make me unhappy. I already got enough things that make me unhappy, and you wanna go and add more to the table? No thank you.
"Then write for yourself", but then what's my motivation here? I create to show others what's on my mind. I myself already know what's on my mind, so the point is moot. It'd be like watching a rerun of my own daydreaming. Except with the added effort of having to write.
"Then don't write", but then how do I communicate? I don't have the time or the energy to draw every single thing that comes to my mind, nor can I go around shoving a sketchbook on people's faces every time I need to say something.
Ok, maybe I really don't need to draw every single thing that I need to say. But my point stands. I can't write. Generic writing advice doesn't do it for me. But I can't not write. Especially not on the internet, where easy image sharing is something relatively recent overall.
So I guess I'll have to brute-force my way through this. Or go mad.
(I also never learned how to write a closing statement. I'll figure out how, eventually)
For now, Chyena out. Peace!